Centering Prayer and Coronavirus
“Prayer is not primarily saying words or thinking thoughts. It is, rather, a stance. It’s a way of living in the Presence.”
Have you ever felt unprepared for something in life?
Maybe when you were a student and you had forgotten there was going to be a test the day you walked into class and the professor tells you to close your books and wishes you good luck before handing out the exam. You suddenly lost confidence in yourself in how well you were doing in that class.
Maybe when you showed up to work one day and your boss calls you into their office for your annual evaluation. You’re expecting a raise that will help you earn enough income to make that big purchase you’ve been holding off on, or you’re expecting that the raise will be enough to take your kids and spouse on that vacation you all have been talking about. But instead of that big raise, you get cents on the dollar. It is nowhere near what you were hoping. You suddenly lose confidence in your ability to provide for yourself and your family.
Maybe you’ve found the man or woman of your dreams. You go on several dates, getting to know one another well enough to be serious. You start talking about the future together and what your ideal life would look like. Once you both have come to the conclusion that you could see yourselves being with the other person, you get engaged! And not long after the engagement comes the wedding! You’re both so excited and so full of love for one another that you decide to begin pursuing one of those dreams that would give you the ideal life: having a child of your own. You begin trying to make it happen, but nothing’s working right. You go to the doctor to see what’s happening, thinking something can be done. But instead of the hoped-for child, you are told that you’ll never be able to have children. You leave the doctor’s office crestfallen. You suddenly lose confidence in your ability to be a growing family.
I certainly wasn’t prepared when I faced all of those scenarios. Those days were hard and over-bearing. They felt as if nothing made sense and the path I thought I was on was suddenly diverted toward somewhere I had no intention of going.
Seeing where our world and our country are in response to the COVID-19/Coronavirus pandemic, being unprepared is an understatement. Hospitals are being over-run. Countries are on lockdown. Grocery shelves are barren out of economic fear and uncertainty. Gatherings and events are either being cancelled completely or being transposed to be broadcast online in order to practice “social distancing.”
Because of how the virus has been spreading, new measures are seemingly taken daily to stop the spread of the virus and #flattenthecurve. Our technologies have kept us up-to-date on the latest developments (for which I am thankful), but have also unintentionally kept us in perpetual anxiety (for which I am not thankful).
Technology, while blissful, can be banal to our overall well-being when we feed ourselves too much of it. Too much of anything can be detrimental to our overall well-being! I enjoy air and love to breathe, but too much air in my lungs will cause them to burst. I love eating Sour Patch Kids (but not at the time, thanks Lent) but if I eat too much of them, diabetes and I will be getting matching tattoos.
So in a time where we have all felt ill-prepared, how do we go forward?
“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.”
The Gift of Centering Prayer
When anxiety and despair gripped my heart in the face of adversity on whether or not we would have a growing family, the gift of centering prayer graced my life. I was looking for a way forward from God on what to do and He lovingly sent this gift to me.
If you are unfamiliar with centering prayer, hang with me for a moment and I’ll share what I’ve gleaned from it.
In Luke 10, busyness had rattled Martha’s ability to rest and wait with the Lord. She complained about how her sister, Mary, just sat at Jesus’ feet like it was no big deal. There were scones and tea to be handed out to everyone and she has the gall to just sit!? (Ok, so no scones but maybe some good bread and tea.) Jesus gently calls her name, “Martha, Martha,” and tells her how she’s operating (“You are worried and upset about many things,”). Mary modeled what was needed at that moment, and Martha was missing out. Would the guests need to be served? Yes. Would the house need to be cleaned up again? Of course. But what would need to happen at that moment? Resting and waiting with the Lord.
If uncertainty and anxiety have become best buds with you lately, you are not alone. It is perfectly fine for you to acknowledge those feelings. Your life may feel like a jar of river water that you scooped up as a kid: you submerged your jar into the river and got some water, but also some dirt. You then found out you could put the lid on and shake what was inside, giving your jar a very dark brown color as the dirt swished and swirled around. As you watched the dirt swirl, you noticed you could not see through the jar as you could before.
However, when you sat the jar down, the dirt stopped swirling and began to settle. After you watched it for a few seconds, you went off to play with some of your toys, and the dirt continued to settle to the bottom of the jar. Maybe an hour or two passes before you come back to look at your jar (you may have even forgotten about it!). You then notice that all the dirt is at the bottom and you can see through the jar once more. You may have even noticed a pebble or two that you had not seen previously when you collected your water and dirt from the river.
Centering prayer is like that: it allows us to rest and wait for a period of time with God, allowing the jar of our heart and mind filled with anxiety and stress to swirl around before Him. While these fears and emotions swirl, we may notice pebbles of insecurity clank against the glass that we’d not previously spotted before. We may watch pebbles of unhealed relationships spin to the top and twirl back down. The dirt will eventually settle after some time and we will see with greater clarity, revealing to us that there is a way to be center ourselves and rest in Christ when everything around us is amuck.
So what is Centering Prayer?
For most of us, when we think of prayer, we think of the many words we offer up to the Lord. Words of petition, of praise, of supplication. Sometimes even words of confession. This is good and encouraging to do, but when we are plugged-in with too many words—digital or print—sometimes the better posture is to rest and wait upon the Lord.
If there are no words (other than maybe a prayer word), does it count as real prayer? If it doesn’t give you a good feeling or experience something in particular, is it doing anything? These are valid questions, but it isn’t possible to judge the value of prayer based on feeling and experience alone. Experience and feeling are not the points of this kind of prayer.
This kind of prayer works slowly over the course of time. Centering prayer allows you to have trust that being with Jesus brings about a transformation that you may be longing for.
So here is a short method for Centering Prayer (taken from Spiritual Disciplines Handbook by Adele Calhoun, p. 209):
Set aside a minimum of 15 minutes (increase the timer as you can). Set a timer if that helps you be less concerned about when to stop.
Settle into a comfortable position.
Intentionally place yourself in the presence of God, in the center of his love.
Choose a simple word, phrase or verse from Scripture that expresses your desire for God (e.g. love, peace, grace, Jesus, great Shepherd). Let this word guard your attention.
Take time to become quiet. It is not unusual for the first minutes to be filled with many noisy thoughts. Don’t worry about them or pay attention to them. Let them go. Gently return your attention to the center of God’s presence and love by repeating your word. When your thoughts wander let them drop to the bottom of your mind. Don’t go after them. Gently return to the presence of Christ through repeating your word. Let the word draw your attention back to Jesus. Be with Jesus. Listen. Be still. When distractions are persisting let one of the following images help you return to Jesus.
Imagine that God’s river of life runs through you. Deep down the river is calm and slow. But on the surface there is rushing and debris. Imagine your distracting thoughts are part of the debris floating in the current. Don’t try to capture these thoughts; release them and let the river of God’s life carry them away. Anytime you are distracted, let the distractions go with the river. Gently return to the presence of Christ with your prayer word.
Imagine that you are visiting a friend who lives on a busy city street. Because it is a warm day, the windows are open and all the noise and bustle of life float into the room through the window. At times you are conscious of sirens or people talking or children laughing, but your attention is devoted to your friend and you do not let your mind follow the sounds outside. As you meet with Jesus, acknowledge the noisy distractions that pull at your attention, but continually return to the moment with Jesus through your prayer word.
Rest in the center of God’s love. Trust that the Holy Spirit who abides in the depths of your spirit connects you with God.
Take several minutes to come out of prayer. Don’t hurry. Breathe in the presence of Christ. Offer yourself to God for the tasks awaiting you (e.g., “I am yours,” or “Remain with me”).
Because this spiritual discipline will be new to many, it will take practice. Maybe you’re like me and you have a little one who needs attention and care when he’s awake. Wait until it’s nap time for them and try this practice out. If you live with a roommate, find a quiet place in your house or go find a welcoming spot outside.
I am no expert at Centering Prayer, but my desire is that I am able to rest with Christ while trying to tame the scattered thoughts of my mind and developing this quiet center that is not attached to the outcomes that may happen in my life. I desire to be better prepared for the unknowns.
I would encourage you to try the above exercise out for a week and see what you may learn about your life in the Lord. Your confidence in the Lord will grow into a solid foundation and while the situations and problems may not be resolved in your life, your new holy perspective will allow you to face them with new insight and the Lord’s calming presence.
